M.L. Elrick (@elrick), Marc Fellhauer (@MarcFell) and Shawn Windsor (@ShawnWindsor) turn Red Shovel Network HQ into their own personal hall of shame.

THE STRAIGHT DOPE: Offering insights that no one asked for — and may wish they never knew — the triumvirate reveals some of their deepest, darkest secrets. We’ll leave it up to you whether you want to listen, but we must warn you it is impossible to unhear what the boys are putting down.

Despite being a handsome hunk of manhood, Marc bares his soul and reveals that he hides from cameras. Is he bashful — or Nosferatu? 

Shy by nature, ML shares that he likes to freak people out with his words and, on occasion, his wardrobe. He tells a tale worthy of Po — you got that, Edgar Allan?!?

The normally retiring Shawn divulges that he likes nothing better than to see vigilantes exact a bloody revenge on evildoers. Is he talking about the silver screen … or should ML and Marc LAY OFF FOR ONCE, DAMMIT!?!

Two words: DANE COOK.

Cheetos, taquitos and … rat turds? 

Shawn likes to good-naturedly (or is it jealously?) jab ML for his high-handed ways. Turns out Star Trek may be partly to blame.

ML tells the “Dirty Angel” story. For once, it’s a short one — but, of course, well-told.

ML tells the “Harold the Dog” story. As usual, it’s a long one — but, for once, not well-told. AT LEAST ACCORDING TO THE BULLIES MARC AND SHAWN. (Anyone got a match?)

Shawn’s long-winded paean to the chili-laden tube steak almost certainly alienates a potential sponsor — despite his cohorts’ desperate attempts to pull him back from the precipice.

THE GREAT DEBATE: A billionaire tells millionaires to leave their politics in the locker room, then pops off in public with his world view, making thousandaire Shawn VERY unhappy. The boys try to calm him down. Do they succeed? There’s only one way to find out: LISTEN.

GEEK OF THE WEEK: The boys go nuclear over a vodka ginned up by some English eggheads and the Reds that is tasteless — regardless of the flavor.

ROOM 7609: Unlike a lot of programs that talk about music, the all-night party in Room 7609 is no sausage party. ML LOVES women who rock — and few rock quite as well as the Go-Go’s, as this week’s selection makes plain.

RIDE, CAPTAIN, RIDE! If you’re looking for a deal on a pedal pub excursion, use promo code ML SOUL to get $25 off a full-size ride with the Michigan Pedaler.

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